today's mileage: 4
on the iPod: "ants marching" -- dave matthews and tim reynolds
Yesterday's distance run has been a long time coming; about three months to be exact, since crossing the finish line on a gorgeous Sunday morning in Chicago's expansive, lush Grant Park. Adjacent to Michigan Avenue and overlooking a world-class skyline, we basked in the physical exhaustion and emotional highs of running 26.2 miles, but my thoughts were already looking forward to the next starting line. As much as I was enjoying the day, it was inevitable to begin contemplation of the next chapter. The time away from training has been great, complete with the holiday season and five races, including two half-marathons. But right now i'm more focused on a single goal; more focused than i've ever been on anything else in life. I want to run marathons, plain and simple. We've picked the Nashville Marathon as our next race, and training has begun.
I was so happy to be running again with my best good friend Mrs. Murie, who's been laying low for the last six weeks because of a calf injury. She's really close to being 100% again, but we took it slow and easy nonetheless. We keep hearing nasty rumors about hills in Nashville and have made a conscious decision to amp up our elevation training for this one. Specific routes that will help with this goal dominated our conversation while we traversed a familiar portion of the trail system. We both commented in the latter miles that our energy levels weren't where they needed to be and that it's time to buy new shoes. (Who wants to go to Rush Running? I do! Love that place.) The good news is that we've got three months to knock the dust off and get ready for the streets of the country music capital of the world. Other than hills, we've also heard about the 20+ live bands that play along the course, as well as the post-race concert that happens the night of the marathon. Being on a Saturday night as opposed to the more-common Sunday, it lends itself to being a pretty big party. It's fair to say that neither of us are physically prepared, but both of us couldn't be happier to be training again.
After the run I had absolutely nothing planned other than taking it easy and hanging out with Abe Lincoln, the best dog on the planet. He's 15 and is completely comfortable with sleeping all day long. We go together like peas and carrots. So we walked to the end of the street, as always he carried his frisbee in his mouth, then he promptly laid down on his blanket and was conked out within minutes. A classic weekend afternoon in the winter months was in order.
Sitting at my kitchen countertop eating a grilled cheese sandwich, I heard a familiar ding and glanced over at my phone. Pavlov would be so proud. Sure enough, the familiar icon of my inbox had the tiny little red "1" in the upper right-hand corner, signifying a new email. It was a message from an old college friend, an amicable fellow, but one that I hadn't talked to in years. In fact, i'm not for sure that we've talked since graduating. He wanted to tell me about an upcoming reunion of our pledge class and was hoping that I'd attend. I immediately felt a wave of emotion, not for sure exactly what to think as I was suddenly confronted with years of my life that I rarely otherwise consciously choose to remember.
My initial reaction was one of pleasant surprise, but that quickly changed to trepidation. The email caught me off guard, and I reread it at least three times. My college experience, particularly being a freshman and sophomore in the SAE house, was a rough time. I was a constant wreck from having to keep up appearances and making sure that I said and did the right things. The goal was to not draw attention to myself, but I wasn't always successful in that endeavor. There were some pretty intuitive people around with some pretty pointed things to say, and they didn't hold back when it came to me. I remember some good times, too, but they were few and far between. I never felt like I fit in with my pledge brothers and was envious that they all got along so well. Unlike them, I was happy to move out of the house and slowly fade away from that part of my life.
Of course i've grown comfortable in my own skin over the years, and those days in the SAE house are water under the bridge. I mean that wholeheartedly. In fact, i'm not for sure if i've ever been more happy and content. But when I remember that chapter in my life I can still see faces that made things really difficult and hear things that were said to me. I wonder where those guys are now and if they still feel the same way. I hope that they are well. Because I am.
I've slowly found what I needed in life, including a great career in education, the Episcopal church, and the best group of friends a guy could have. Things also got better when my parents moved to Fayetteville. But possibly more than anything else, i've found community in running. It's the single most influential thing that i've encountered. It's afforded me the chance to stand out while simultaneously being accepted completely as part of a group. And for the first time ever I fit into the group effortlessly. Well, with some effort. It takes just a little bit of effort to lace up and run. I'm by no means the fastest in the pack, but I'd like to think I can hang with the big dogs.
I emailed my college buddy back and thanked him for including me, letting him know that I was looking forward to the reunion this summer. It's been close to 20 years since i've seen most of those guys and it will be good to catch up and see them again. Like me, they've probably changed for the better, too. That's my hope, anyway. I don't have time to look back in life and hold anger, there's too many trails and too many races that are waiting right around the corner. One of them is the Nashville Marathon.
Training season has officially started, and it's been a long time coming.
Run.
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